Here we go again!

I have been blessed– I try my very best to live life to the fullest.  When one adds in my on-going love affair with a Grey Goose vodka martini –it seemed only appropriate to entitle my blog, “Tiffany’s Life-tini”—

Here we go again!

Several years ago, I decided that with all my experience I would start writing a blog. Based on my on-going quest to help women change their life by supporting and counseling them, my journey has been extraordinary. Often women have shared how my words of wisdom have gotten them through difficult times.  

I have been blessed– I try my very best to live life to the fullest.  When one adds in my on-going love affair with a Grey Goose vodka martini –it seemed only appropriate to entitle my blog, “Tiffany’s Life-tini”—Life, laughs, inspiration, friendship and everything else—served with a classic Tiffany twist.   As you well know, humor plays a very important part of what makes me, me!

Over the past couple of years, life got in the way. With career changes, health issues, new adventures, sad departures, and fun activities….my blog simply disappeared into blog heaven.

Ironically, I continued to write –non-stop.  If in fact, I had $1.00 for every page I have ever written, I would probably be richer than Jeff Bezos—particularly since his divorce.

Well I’m back and Tiffany’s Life-tini is here to stay.  I would LOVE IT if you would follow my blog so you don’t miss out. Trust me when I say it’s going to be the best yet. We are going to cover everything from social issues, personal growth, relationships, stress, business performance, and even SEX!  How FUN!

What makes me an expert on any and all of these topics—is a simple answer– it’s YOU!  When you call upon me for advice, you are giving a great gift –a wonderful learning experience. My pals like Gina Timothy, Heidi Winslow, Jenn Rudd and so many others who will reach out, and allow me the honor of being their sounding board. Just add in my niece Kierstyn Kalman who is educating me on the new rules of dating –plus Kacy Wyand who has taught me the joys and challenges of having 4 fabulous children and suddenly my experience only expands. Of course, I have to mention our wonderful granddaughter Niccie who is inviting me into the world of a 16 year old. And believe me that is most fascinating.

So here we go again –please take this new adventure with me!

To keep up to date go just follow my blog by subscribing! It’s easy! Once on the blog page you can enter your email address to receive notifications about each new blog post that will arrive directly in your email inbox. And be sure to check back on my Facebook page @TiffanyJamesUCW for updates there as well. Remember, as I said it is all of YOU that help me to learn, experience and write so I love your feedback and dialogue on every post.


The Beauty of Age in Marriage and Life

Like things change in marriage, over time they also change in the way we live our lives. 

I vividly remember when Walter and I were first married. While we loved each other, boy we certainly had quite the time adjusting to this whole “togetherness” thing. While we “dated” for over two years much of that time was spent apart, Walter was in Vietnam fighting for our Country.

Walter is an only child and I am the oldest of three. So, neither of us were “shrinking violets.” After we were married, there were debates on everything from spending money, to where we would live, to what school our son Jamie would attend. Needless to say, we both truly believed we were right. And if you are thinking it was because we were young and stubborn, it was not. We both had a strong conviction in our beliefs.

As the years went by, being right was not quite as important. Compromise became more of a rule rather than the exception. Accepting things at face value and not taking everything personally also helped our love grow. Last but not least, humor became a very important part of our day to day relationship.

Let me tell you just what I mean with a little story:

Several months ago, Walter and I were headed to Vegas for 5 days.  I am NOT an efficient packer. When I say I am NOT an efficient packer I mean, I always bring way too many clothes, shoes and whatever else I can fit into my luggage.  And I start packing days if not weeks beforehand depending on where we are going and how long we are staying.  For our 5 ½ months cruise, I literally started packing a year in advance. Yes, 45 boxes were lined up in our disco for months.

But let me bring you back to Vegas. Although I only had two suitcases, one was large and the other was very large. Walter looked at the luggage  and said to me, “Honey, how can you possibly be taking two suitcases to Vegas for only five days?”

Of course, I had a perfectly logical explanation: “One suitcase has my clothes, lingerie, shoes, belts and purses.  The other has all my skin care items, my  hair products, my electric rollers, and all  my cosmetics.”

Without skipping a beat, Walter replied,  “Hmm you need one large suitcase for all your beauty  stuff –I really didn’t know you were that ugly.”  Years ago, I’m sure I would have found no humor in that.  I would have taken it as a personal insult OR I would have felt guilty that I was packing so much and made changes. Yet today, I thought that was hysterically funny. I laughed so hard, I had tears rolling down my eyes.

Of course, in my younger days, I also would not have even needed that second suitcase with “cosmetics.” In my 20’s and 30”s my beauty routine was simple, wash face, put on La Mer Cream and put on a bit of makeup. Now, there is so much more time and effort needed to look good, not overdone, but age appropriately attractive. As I continue to laugh just thinking about it, I can say, “Yes,  wonderful Walter, evidently I am that ugly.” Or as Coco Chanel said, “Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.”

Like things change in marriage, over time they also change in the way we live our lives. Embracing every day with a sense of gratitude, love and humor is the key to enjoying a joy filled life.

Where the Crawdads Sing….


I hope you are part of my book club and reading this book. If you started it a few weeks ago, I’m sure you finished it quickly. There are so many nuances In Where the Crawdads Sing– nature, friendship, isolation, love and murder.  We’ll be having our first Book Club Facebook Live on Monday July 22nd. All you have to do is login to Facebook and join the live stream video. We will be talking all things Delia Owens and Where the Crawdads Sing!  

In order to be fully prepared for our Facebook Live Event, I encourage you to read about the author Delia Owens.  She is quite fascinating. Ms. Owens is the co-author of three internationally bestselling nonfiction books about her life as a wildlife scientist in Africa. Where the Crawdads Sing is her first non-fiction novel


Where the Crawdads Sing is Delia Owens first non-fiction novel, which just also happens to be a best seller.

If you’re wondering how Ms. Owens’ love for nature was so masterfully blended into this novel, perhaps this simple overview of her young life will answer that question.

“Della was born in southern Georgia, and grew up riding horses in the woods around Thomasville. Her mother, also an outside-girl, encouraged Delia to explore far into the oak forests, saying “Go way out yonder where the crawdads sing.” Her mother taught her how to hike without stepping on rattle snakes, and most important not to be afraid of critters of any kind. Delia went on to spend most of her life in or near true wilderness, and since childhood has thought of Nature as a true companion. One of her best friends.”

As you may know, Where the Crawdad Sing was on New York Times Best Seller List for months including Number One. And, Reese Witherspoon bought the rights to the novel and will be directing the movie.


Reese Witherspoon and Delia Owens, Reese Witherspoon recently bought the movie rights to Owens novel.

Can’t wait!  Maybe we’ll just have to do a Book Club Meeting in Hawaii when the movie is going to premier!  Now, that could be a plan!

Lady Like- Goals, Glass Ceilings, and Celebrating Success.




 USWNT Player Megan Rapinoe celebrating a goal scored in the USA’s 13-0 victory over opponent Thailand, the largest margin of victory in a FIFA Women’s World Cup Game.

You may have read that the U.S. Women’s National Soccer (USWNT) team beat Thailand 13-0, the biggest defeat in World Cup history. And instead of being applauded, the women were criticized on social media for celebrating.

It seems some felt it was unsportsmanlike to continue to score goals and make this win so lopsided.

A critical soccer analyst and former Canadian National Team player tweeted, “You are one of the best teams in the world. Act like it.”  I’m really confused.  What was the appropriate modus operandi? Once you are winning by however many goals should the team put on a pretty smile, act sweetly, and play less effectively? That’s ridiculous. Do you think if this was the men’s soccer team the social media response would have been the same? We all know the answer to that question.

In response to the absurdity of criticism, tennis great Billie Jean King tweeted,“Athletes should always play to their skill level.” Let me add, Life is not a spectator sport, in every facet of life, “Play to WIN!”

What are we teaching young girls if we are telling those women on the field to stop celebrating when they achieve a certain level? Or rather what are we teaching them if we say you can be good and you can even be great, but only up to a certain point?  That’s like saying set your goals and reach for the sky —but make sure you stop before you get to the stars.  With philosophies like that, women will never truly break that glass ceiling.

What are we teaching young girls if we are telling those women on the field to stop celebrating when they achieve a certain level?

Women’s sports have come a long way –but it is still nowhere near equal to the funding and support men’s sports receive.  And let me add that these same double standards apply to many professions. I have witnessed it first hand in business.  Let me give you an example early on in my career.

At my very first real job, I was a Secretary to the Director of Advertising/PR.  As part of my responsibilities I was able to use my talents –specifically in writing copy and the company’s monthly newsletter.  In fact, that’s why I accepted the position. I received great comments from everyone on my talent and it was reflected in my pay raises.

The Company was growing rapidly and my very sweet boss Gayton shared with me that we were going to add a new member to our team. He was moving ‘George’ from engineering into our department.  When I asked what George’s job description would be, he said that George would be writing copy and the newsletter. Of course, I asked if George had any experience and the reply was “No, but you can train him.”  I would then be the Assistant to both George and Gayton. Does anyone see anything wrong with that scenario? Because I certainly did. No, I was not going to mentor someone to be my boss.

I went marching into the VP of Human Resources and promptly gave my resignation.  He was stunned and of course asked why I was quitting.  I told him.  1 hour later it was announced that I was being promoted to Assistant PR Director and could hire my own secretary.  By the way, this was before the threat of discrimination.  I was NOT going to take a back seat to a male, simply because I was female. Despite the fact that George refused to talk to me ever again and some men AND women actually criticized me because George was so nice, I really didn’t care. Nice did not make him qualified to take my job. In fact, I wrote a great article on myself and my new position for the newsletter. Yes, I did deserve the promotion and I celebrated. Remember, success is not for the weak spirited. Maybe because success requires a strong will, passion and a little bit of bitchiness society often criticizes women who have too much of itwe’ll talk more about that later. And if a woman has never been called a bitch in her life, she has probably led a very dull life.

But let’s get back to the U.S. women’s national soccer team. I am proud of YOU.  And you should celebrate your victory with pride! You broke records, scored goals and inspired generations of young girls behind you. You did it.

For any of you who think these amazing women, should not have celebrated, let me give you a few examples of men who have won!

USA Men’s National Basketball Team

The largest margin of victory in a single game for a USA National Team is 83 points and was done in the 2012 London Olympics on Aug. 2, 2012, when the Americans defeated Nigeria 156-73.

Super Bowl Victory

In 1990, the San Francisco 49ers beat the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XXIV 55–10.  

Major League Baseball

Aug. 22, 2007: Texas Rangers 30 – Baltimore Orioles 3

 Last but not least in 1966, Muhammad Ali knocked out Brian London with a sensational 12 punch combination in just 3.12 seconds.  And he was called an unfair fighter —OOOPS I’m wrong he was called “The GREATEST”

Ladies you are THE GREATEST! And celebrating as a team like you did was the best “girl”  gift you could give each other.

Waiting for Tom

I’m in love with Tom and counting down the days until I can see him again.

Tom Brady, that is.

OK maybe I’m not “in love” with him, but I’m certainly in lust. In fact, if Tom were dumb, nonathletic and poor, I might stand a shot. Hey, he might be enamored with a rich old lady. But Tom is talented and, let’s face it, he has Giselle.

Recently I started wondering what Tom and Giselle could possibly argue about. Most couples “debate” finances, careers, and children. I’m pretty confident finances are not an issue. Their careers are in place and with the discipline that both Tom and Giselle have illustrated, something tells me they are great parents.

Maybe they argue about who is more beautiful on a specific day? I think Tom wins. And from what I have witnessed from Mr. Brady, he thinks Giselle is fabulous. In fact, he always thanks Giselle before his parents. (That might be his only flaw.)

They can’t argue about sex. Seriously, they must desire each other nonstop.

I have it! Perhaps they argue over which is more nutritious, kale or spinach. Or maybe they have heated debates over whether quinoa or brown rice tastes better. And can you imagine Tom’s anger if Giselle brings a bag of potato chips into the house? Hell hath no fury like a man who is a legend at 40!

I may never really know what happens behind closed doors. But I want Tom to know that if the arguments become too much to bear, I’m here! Even if you want a 24 hour reprise, please come to Hawaii and visit. I promise the only two words I will utter are “Yes, Tom!” And don’t you worry about my husband, Walter. He fully understands. Something tells me that Walter thinks he’s pretty safe.

The good news is that in just 9 days, I can feast my eyes on Tom. I respect his talent, I adore his passion and dedication to his game, and last but not least I think he is just drop-dead gorgeous!

If I can’t have Tom, do you think I stand a shot with Scott Eastwood?

Probably not. Sad to say Scott is young enough to be my son. His father, Clint Eastwood, is old enough to be my father, so that’s another no for me.

I wonder if Jon Snow and I would work out instead!

#TomBrady #patriots #NFL #gisellebundchen

How I Found the Fountain of Youth Through Hawaii Five-0

This morning we got a call from Hawaii Five-0. Yes, the TV show. They had previously filmed at our home and wanted to know if we would be interested in having them here again for an upcoming show.

Let’s be clear: When they film, a HUGE crew arrives at 7 a.m., and a single scene takes an entire day to shoot. It is quite disruptive. On the other hand, it is FUN!

So I said, “Sure, come by and take a look.” The protocol is for the director, producer, location manager, and four or five other staffers to visit to see if the location fits their needs and the plot.

As luck would have it, our pool was down to a cold 84 degrees (yes, I’m spoiled), so I had decided not to go in this morning. Instead I had showered, shampooed, and laboriously applied my makeup so I would look presentable. Since my sprained ankle is on the way to recovery, I even put on a pair of heels—with my flat shoes close by. And that was before I knew the crew from Five-0 was coming by. So I was “fluffed and buffed” when they arrived.

When the door rang, I put on my heels and greeted them. Both WJJ and I showed them around. Several of the gentlemen seemed to spend a good deal of time in Walter’s grand and rather intimidating office. The others took photos of the living room, the dining room, and the ocean view. The whole inspection took about 30 minutes and then Walter escorted them out.

When Walter returned, he noticed my flat shoes were on. He jokingly commented, “For Hawaii Five-0 you put on heels; for me, flats!” We both laughed. Walter then asked if I had heard what the gentlemen had said while in his office.

It seems they had commented, “Oh yes, we remembered this house with the painting of that beautiful woman who is still beautiful.” That woman would be me!

Now before you all start thinking just how conceited I am, let me remind you what hangs in Walter’s office. It’s the painting Olivia did of me for Walter’s 40th birthday. I was 35 years old, was working out twice a day, and was bone thin with big boobs. When Walter had a choice of a painting of me elegantly gowned in lingerie or me in a tight, black corset with stiletto heels posing very seductively on the floor, which do you think he chose?

Yes, the one with me in corset. The painting is incredibly provocative, but it is me.

While I walk by that painting every day, I never really look at it; it could quickly become very depressing. My sister Chris tries to convince me that I am getting better, not older. Seriously, no. I looked better back then, and I am 100% sure that these wonderful young men (young being the operative word) probably said, “Boy, she was one sexy knockout … back then.” And maybe they added that she is still a “beautiful older woman.” Or perhaps Walter added the “still beautiful” part. Who knows?

From today on, though, when I look at my painting, I will admire Olivia’s talent and my sense of self and confidence. Yes, I was one hot chick.

But I won’t let the changes to my body affect my mood. Instead, I will embrace Sophia Loren’s advice:

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”

What Am I Feeling?

Several people have asked why I have not written any new blogs lately.
I have lots of reasons: I’ve been traveling. I’ve been busy. I’ve been ill.

But the truth is, I’ve been lazy and uninspired.

Normally, writing is my passion. If I had a dollar for every word I’ve ever written, I’m sure I would top Jeff Bezos as the wealthiest person in the world. I think, and then I write. But, in order for me to write my Tiffany’s Life-tini blog, not only do I have to think, I also have to feel.

It can be joy, happiness, anger, sadness, humor, fear, surprise, passion, or any other emotion, but I have to feel something. And the only thing I have felt lately was the “prick” of the needle in order to get my latest blood test. Then I have to await the results of my hematocrit and iron levels and my doctor’s decision on what to do next.

You might think that I would be worrying endlessly about each blood test. But here’s the scoop: I refuse to worry about what may or may not happen.

I will not put any thought or emotion into speculating what the results might be. Over the last few weeks, for example, the results have been bad, then worse, then slightly better, and finally somewhat better.

But think about when you experience lack of thoughts and feelings. If you think of nothing and feel nothing, then there is nothing. And that is exactly why I have been unable to write anything. I feel nothing.

Instead I’ve been way too focused on eating liver—lots of liver, enjoying kale & and spinach, snacking on eggs, ordering steak that is still mooing, slurping raw oysters, cracking lobsters, eating lentils, and indulging in dark chocolate—obviously not all together. Ironically, this iron thing has been a really good excuse for me to eat lots of dark chocolate.

As mentioned, thankfully, my iron level has risen. It’s far from normal, but it’s better. That’s the good news.

The bad news is they still have no idea what caused this chaos. The even worse news is that I’ve probably gained 10 pounds. And I can just imagine what my cholesterol level is going to be. I’m sure in a subsequent doctor’s appointment, I will be told, “Congratulations, your hematocrit and iron are finally back to normal. But your cholesterol is really high. So I want you to eliminate sweets, liver, eggs, all red meat, and all shellfish.” Anyone want to take that bet?

So, I’m back … and hopefully on the road to recovery.

How can I tell? I’m writing a blog, so I’m obviously feeling better.

Not Qualified

I really love taking those silly quizzes that appear online. For Example: “What type of Disney Princess would you be?” Or, “Who are you in one word?” I got Divine… I liked that! Of course I really LOVED, “Who is your Evil Twin?” It was Nancy Cosimini…of course.

I also love doing surveys. I do the Coke Survey, the Red Lobster Survey and even the CVS Survey. Secretly, I am hoping to win some sort of Grand Prize.

Today, I received an email from Amazon with a survey. You do know I am the Amazon Queen so I was delighted to be chosen. The email said the survey would take 15 minutes. Today was a rather hectic day, so I thought, “Why not?” Fifteen minutes of useless, relaxation time.

First Question:

Have you purchased women’s basics —t-shirts, leggings, or tanks in the last year?
Answered, “Yes”.

Next question:

Are you or any close family member involved in any of the following: Check all the apply:

• Market research
• Clothing store or specialty store
• Manufacturer of clothing or accessories
• Advertising or Public Relations
• Online retailer or e-commerce
• Bank, Brokerage Firm or Financial Company
• Publishing Company including magazines, newspapers and blogs.
• None of the above

Well I checked every category because members of my family are in all of those categories. The next thing I knew, I was told that I wasn’t qualified to take the survey. What do you mean —not qualified. So I then re-answered the questions and only checked off two of the choices. Still, “NOT QUALIFIED”. I then checked off “None of the above” and the survey continued. However by that time, I was bored.

Now I want you all to read the above categories again. Seriously the only way that you would not have a close family member in at least ONE of those categories is if you were a sterile orphan who had never left their home. BTW for all you Direct Sales Diva’s and Divo’s …your website would be considered “online retailer”.

Obviously, the survey company had a specific demographic in mind. But damn if I can figure out who that might be. So if you got this survey and they invited you to participate, please let me know how you became “The chosen one”. Well I didn’t make the Cheer-leading squad in High School and now the Amazon Survey has shunned me. Life will go on but I may never be the same.

#amazon #survey

Lose 30 Pounds in 90 Days

You may not know this, but I lost 30 pounds in 3 months. This is not a joke. I absolutely lost 30 pounds in 90 days & I have the photo’s to prove it. Would you like to know how I did it?

Here’s my Monday through Thursday Diet:

Breakfast -Black Coffee –Grapefruit and 1 slice of toasted thin whole wheat bread with butter

Lunch–a bowl of spinach with one slice of melted cheese.

Dinner –Large salad with plain vinegar —Broiled Chicken Breast — broccoli. –Green beans with oregano and vinegar.


Breakfast and Lunch -Same as above

Dinner –Substitute Broiled Fish for Chicken


Breakfast: Two hard-boiled eggs with ½ one slice whole English muffin. (Sometimes I splurged and made soft boiled eggs)

Lunch: One thick slice of turkey –sliced tomatoes and green beans

Dinner: Large Salad–lots of lettuce–tomatoes etc.


Breakfast: Coffee with Cream –One Stella Dora Cookie (50 Calories)

Lunch: Steak with ½ baked potato with small dollop of sour cream

Dinner: 1 cup of Progresso low sodium soup

Snacks consisted primarily of fruit. If I were ravenous, I would have a cup of Progresso Low Sodium Soup. NO WINE, VODKA, LICQUOR, SWEETS, CHOCOLATE OR CANDIES. My only “sugar” was sugarless gum.

And I walked or worked out just about every single day.

This diet is exactly what I followed for 12 consecutive weeks. I did not cheat once!

Did my diet work? You “betcha”… I lost 30 pound in 90 days. And that is 100% honest! I went from a size 16 to a size 8! Yes, congratulations are in order.

Oh…. Oopsie… I may have forgotten to mention that this was my 90-day diet, a few years ago –precisely when I was 21 years old. I went from 158 pound to 128 pounds. In addition, I completely transformed myself -that’s another story.
Hmmm, I sure had a lot of drive, determination and discipline back then. I had a “weight goal” and I was going to hit it. Congratulations to me!

Time moves on and those extra pounds have started to creep up.
Frankly, I would really LOVE to lose 15 or 20 pounds NOW. Ah, unfortunately I’m not sure the discipline and drive are the same. Actually I am sure. Nope–not there. I am just not willing to give up all the “stuff” that I enjoy. Last night we feasted on lasagna and red wine. Tonight we’ll probably have marinated pork with baked potatoes and a vodka martini! Though I gave up chocolate and nuts for Lent, I’ll probably have a Greek cookie and just a little Amaretto for my after dinner “treat”.

Whoa is me….. My latest dilemma — Loose weight OR enjoy life. Oh, I know someone is going to attempt to lecture me on “moderation” and portion control etc. Hello…. I have been 158 pounds and 104 pounds… so I think I understand all that.

I’d like to say that the reason it is so difficult to loose weight is age & metabolism. But truth be known, it’s not that at all. Stated simply I like my life and I like my food and I like my vodka and/or wine. I like my husband, I like being out with friends and enjoying good food and finally I like my extra little goodies. So… maybe it’s time for me to give up my size 6 pants and buy size 10’s or 12’s.

Or I could try to convince myself that I prefer to be “overweight”. After all, I don’t look gaunt…. My fuller face hides my wrinkles! And damn it, I look healthy.

Of course, when I look at the beautiful photos that David Kawika has taken of UndercoverWear lingerie and corsets with gorgeous Gerry…. I yearn for the days when my thunder thighs did not rub against each other. I lament about the size of my waist –Scarlett O’Hara I am not. Tears fill my eyes, as my arms will jiggle –just a bit. Again I say…. Whoa is me… The good news is that I live in Hawaii –where a good muu muu will hide a multitude of sins! Do you think I can find one in gold lame?

#davidkawika #diet #undercoverwear

It’s My Turn Monday!

Have you thought about how often you put others first. I’m sure every day of your life, you are doing something for someone else. While that is often necessary and certainly admirable, I strongly believe that occasionally, you should put the world “on hold” and take some time for you!

So today we are going to take “baby steps”. We’re going to talk about things you can do just for you that will NOT take a whole lot of time out of your busy life. And they cost virtually NOTHING!

So I have 3 assignments for you to complete this week. Are you ready?

Assignment One:

• My last blog talked about “mindfulness”. Mindfulness is simply TRULY being in the moment and putting your full emphasis on what you are doing. As an FYI, while I sometimes fall into the trap of multi-tasking, I do not believe it is effective. I think that doing one thing at a time truly does work. But that’s a whole other topic.

So for your first mindfulness assignment, I want you to make a cup of coffee or tea and get a piece of toast or a donut or anything else you chose to enjoy with your coffee. Now comes the hard part. I want you to sit down in a quiet place –no music, no cell phone, no newspaper, no distractions –and I want you to CONCENTRATE on simply eating your toast and drinking your coffee. The only thing you are going to think about is the taste of the toast and coffee. Drink your coffee as if you were at a wine tasting. Feel the crunch of the toast. Don’t just chew it -savor it as if you were enjoying Crème Brûlée. If you’ve added butter or jam, how does that feel on your palate? Do you prefer the taste of the toast or the flavor of the coffee? Oh. I know, someone is about to say, “Tiffany has lost her mind”. No, Tiffany is trying to calm her mind and re–generate her brain. As easy as this assignment seems, if you do not practice meditation, then most of you will NOT find this an easy task. So go ahead and try this and please share your results.

Assignment Two

• This one is easy–I want you to pick up the phone and call someone you care about and with whom you have not spoken for at least 3 month. Make sure that you put the time aside –with no interruptions. Stay focused on the person and truly LISTEN to every word they are saying. Don’t have your “hidden agenda”. Hmmm for my Party Plan gals…. Kinda sounds like recruiting. LOL Several years ago, a great friend of mine, Chris Hemmeter gave me an immense compliment. He said, “When you are talking to Tiffany James, you feel like you are the most important person in the world”. I kindly thanked him and replied, “When I am speaking to someone, at the moment in time, to me–they ARE the most important person in the world. “ If you are taking the time to talk, take the time to listen and take the time to care.

Assignment Three

• Break ONE pattern that will make your life more pleasant. Each morning I wake up and I put the news on the TV in my dressing area. That’s important here in Hawaii –because by the time we’re up…we’ve lost 5 East coast hours. Then of course I do the “morning ritual” you know, brush teeth, contacts in, and shower blah blah blah. I have always kept the news on. Now, after I get up and put on the news and thankfully the world is reasonably safe, I shut the TV off. I then put on “Happy Music”. If you wonder what “Happy Music is…let me tell you what it is NOT. It is not “Look Down” from Les Miserable or Dance With my Father by Luther Vandros or Someone Like You by Adele. No, that’s depressing music. I listen to “Chicago” both the band and the play. I love Grease. And my favorite vocalists are Pink Martini! BTW, if you are “daring”, put on Polka music. Yes, you heard me correctly Polka music. I know you think I’m daft, but WJJ puts it on in the car and believe it or not…. you can’t help but smile and start taping your foot. Yes, Polka music is Happy Music…just ask Lawrence Welk … “And a one, two, three.” Oh and yes, it’s true… as a teenager, WJJ toured with Lawrence Welk and Myron Floran the accordion player. For my Hawaii friends, we all know it is our Christmas Eve tradition that we all sing-a-long as Walter plays the accordion and I lead the chorus. Except this year, where our wonderful friends the Carungi’s joined us and brought their daughter Amanda’s and her friend–who just happened to be Glen Campbell’s beautiful and very talented daughter Ashley. Somehow by popular opinion, Ashley took my role. And damn it… she is good….really good! Guess who’s not going to be invited next year? Just joking. You really should listen to this gorgeous young lady sing.

So those are your assignments: Be Mindful –Listen to a Friend & Break One Pattern in your life to make your life better. Bottom line: These simple steps allow you to put YOU first –even if it is only for a moment, an hour or a day. I am a strong believer that in order to helpful to others, you really have to take care of YOU! That is NOT selfish. That is merely a way for you to stay focused, stay strong, stay positive and stay healthy! And guess what? You deserve a little “time out” for YOU!

#mindfulness #partyplan #ashleycampbell #selfish